How much beauty sleep is too much?

Before starting radiation, I was told, by those who had experienced it as well as the doctor who administers it, that radiation has only two side effects: fatigue and sunburn.

I suspect there are more that they don't discuss -- like cumulative effects that could deliver an unpleasant surprise in a decade or two, but the reality is you have to deal with the monster at the door and not concentrate on the one who may come knocking somewhere down the road. Besides, by then I'll be staring down at the yellow tennis balls on my walker and wondering where my tennis racket went.

The radiology techs had given me several tubes of Aquapore gel to apply in the morning and the evening to help prevent the burn that can accompany radiation. They also gave me a special deodorant to use -- one that doesn't contain aluminum.

I've completed 5 weeks of radiation now and I'm just starting to get a little raw under the arm. But that will improve shortly and certainly won't worsen, because for the remaining seven days of treatment, I'm receiving a newly focused dose that doesn't irradiate the whole breast, but instead is aimed solely at the scar and lump cavity beneath the skin. That should prevent the raw area from getting more exposure. The Aquapore has done a good job as a scorch preventer.

But there is no gel that eases the fatigue factor. When I get home from my treatment, I read the daily newspaper and work the Suduko puzzle. I get about halfway through it and my eyes close and my head nods, and I limp down the hallway and toss myself onto the bed for a quick nap -- if quick can be defined as about three hours. The nap helps, but by 10 p.m., I am once again toast.

I have so many things to do at home, including the annual planting of flowers. Usually, I'll dig in and keep at it until I'm done, hoping to beat the always impending storm so that the plantings get a good soaking. This year, storms come and go and all I've created a dirt home for is the basil plant. I'll get it done, but not by the usual date, and more than likely, not all at once.

I feel like a maple tree that's been sapped. And I know the fatigue will linger awhile even after the Sandi nuking has ceased, but "normal" or the "new normal" is on the horizon after seven more days, and from here, the view looks lovely.