Christmas cookies and a barium cocktail

Before I left the oncologist's office, she wrote out orders for two more tests to add to my list: a CAT scan and a full-body bone scan, the latter requiring a barium cocktail. Yum. Ostensibly these were to be baseline tests for future comparisons in follow-up visits. If there is scar tissue or nodules from long-past infections, they need to be noted and watched for changes down the road. Of course, I also immediately thought that if there was any secondary cancer setting up residence elsewhere within my housing -- sort of like cancer's winter home in a southern clime, like my liver -- this would ferret it out. That's worth the barium torture.

Also, she wanted me to have an H1N1 inoculation. Swine flu is no treat for a chemo patient. I was also equipped with a list of "cranial prosthesis" providers and an appointment to return on Dec. 30 for the results of my tumor analysis from the lab, and to discuss my most likely chemo package plan.

So, basically I had the full month of December to lead a normal life, other than a couple of tests. No treatments until January. And the good news was that, after six weeks of hurting, my left knee seemed to have healed itself. The bad news was my right knee decided it was its turn. I had swelling behind the knee and intermittent pain. Equal treatment for identical parts. Hopefully it was a temporary situation.

I dove into Christmas preparations. I accomplished my shopping fairly easily with crack-of-dawn excursions on Saturday mornings at participating stores. Checked that off the list. I began my insane, obsessive annual Christmas baking marathon, but reduced the usual 22 batches to 17, as I had a later start this year. I considered simply not baking, but it's become such a big part of our family holiday gatherings that I couldn't abandon it. And I think, in the back of my mind, I actually thought that if something went sour in my treatment and this turned out to be my last Christmas -- I know, morbid, but really, we never know which could be our last Christmas -- I didn't want it to be the one year I didn't bake. Got the Christmas cards in the mail. Put up some pitiful lights and some greenery outside. Jeff put up the tree about a week before Christmas and instead of the usual 500 ornaments I decorate it with, I put up about 50 and called it a day. I figured I'd be putting all of that away in the middle of treatment and didn't want to make it an overwhelming job.

The following week, in one afternoon, I got my lab work and H1N1 shot, had my last check-up with the surgeon and picked up my two barium bottles for the scan. I was offered vanilla, banana or berry. I asked which had the best feedback. Berry. And make sure it's really chilled, I was advised. Yep, that ought to up the delicious factor, but chilled vs lukewarm sounded exactly right.

I scheduled the two scans for the morning of Dec. 21 -- an early Christmas gift to me -- and concentrated on the joys and the music of the holiday season, for I had many blessings to celebrate, and loving friends and family to celebrate with. Who could ask for anything more?